Excellence vs. Excuses – Part 1

As a natural part of personal development every individual constructs their own “model of the world and how it works.” They use that model to make sense of what happens to them and to decide how to react to events and other people in an attempt to get what they want.

Models can vary in their accuracy (the degree to which they reflect the real world) and efficacy (how well and how often they can yield the results that their holder wants).

A “model” is not real – it’s a working hypothesis. Some models are more resourceful and effective than others in achieving what one wants and so it’s worthwhile examining our own and other people’s models to determine whether an adjustment to them would lead to better or more consistent outcomes than we are currently experiencing.

Cause And Effect

Which side of the C and E equation are you on?
• Are you the person who causes the things in your life or
• Are you the effect of things that happen to you?

Which side is more empowering:
To be the Cause or to be the Effect?

You need to come from strength, “I cause all the effects in my world.”

It doesn’t matter whether this is true or not, the RESULT of acting as if it is true, is empowerment.
• Teddy Roosevelt: I wasn’t a very brave man, so I just acted as if I was until I became one.
• Act as if… until it becomes true.
• Fake it until you make it!

Effect Side

People who see themselves in Life, as being at the effect end of the cause-and-effect formula, usually talk about their reasons for lacking results. Those at cause usually talk about the actions they take to get results.

When those at effect don’t complete paperwork on time it’s because “this event or this person prevented me from meeting my commitment”.

When they don’t get their sale, it’s because “this event or these people pushed me around”.

When they don’t complete any assigned task, it’s because “these things happened that prevented me from doing this”.

When they don’t make the calls or contacts that will advance their role and achieve their goals within a business, it’s because “these things had to be done first; this thing wasn’t completely ready; other people did not want to see me” etc. Perhaps the “other people” sensed that this person did not have the power to change themselves, let alone assist others to change and so went to someone else for a solution.

When they fail to follow the processes and systems that have been developed by past experience and proven to produce results, those at effect will say it’s because “you haven’t taken into account the type of circumstances I’m facing; you don’t understand the economy right now; other people won’t see me; my clients/circumstances/challenges/talents are different; the systems don’t work the way they should; etc. etc., etc.”

I would have been a success except for:
• My parents
• My teachers
• My wife
• My ex wife
• My ex partner
• My clients
• My university professor
• The company’s systems
• My health
Your beliefs shape your behavior – if you believe you’re shy (fearing rejection), you’ll act as though you are – which is exactly the same thing as being shy!

In a sales setting, that means you may not make the calls you need to make to grow your business – and you will be right in fearing rejection because you create it! In a family setting that means you may not make the moves to display or affirm affection for fear of not having them reciprocated. So no one will know that you hold those feelings – and everyone will probably react as though you don’t – and you’ll be right: You are rejected!

Not a good place to be – on the Effect side. Next time we’ll focus on the better half.

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© Rich Kohler 2015. All rights reserved. For copies, please contact Rich at rich@rich-kohler.com.

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